Lately, I’ve been thinking about the routines and good habits I’d formed pre-pandemic and just how many of those have fallen to the wayside. I’ve been thinking about which ones I need to get back to so that I feel like my old self again. Some of them, no matter how bad I want them, seem impossible. Some of them feel pretentious in times like these, like launching my podcast. Some things, like building a cool cabin on our new property, seem rather daunting when I’m still not organized here at #magnoliaridgeLA.
2020 was off to such a powerful start. I’d developed routines and habits and made announcements about new plans. Then, there was a hard stop to all of that productivity and I’ve not known how to respond. I’ve gotten back into some of my old groove, and some things just simply won’t fall back into place.
When things first shut down, my Enneagram 3 mind screamed mean things at me about my lack of productivity. Then — finally — I remembered something important about myself. I can’t force it. Sometimes, I just have to wait things out. Sometimes, I have to sit still for a little bit and wait for the next right steps to appear. I’ve talked about that before.
Maybe you’re with me on this. Maybe you’re longing to get back to “normal” and you just can’t seem to make anything normal happen. Maybe you miss your routines. Maybe, you feel like you’re wasting valuable time. Here’s my advice to you that came from my own pep talk to myself:
Whatever you’re doing right now is perfectly fine. Stop thinking about ALL THE THINGS and just search for the next right thing. Just look for one habit to bring back. One item from your old routine that you miss. None of us are going to magically revert back to our January 2020 selves. Instead, we have an opportunity for a reset. What do you miss most from that old structure? Bring it back and let the rest wait. Look for one thing. One, next right thing, and we’ll get to the rest later.
This pep talk was originally sent to my newsletter subscribers and the message has stuck with me. (If you don’t want to miss any of these words in the future, be sure you’re subscribed here.)
One of the ways I’ve regrouped lately, has been with my morning journaling. Ever since I attended RISE, I’ve written down my 5 daily gratitudes and 10 dreams in my Start Today journal. I’d honed in on the 10 things I thought I wanted most. I wrote them every day with a pretty colored pen. Until the pandemic, that is. My last entry was on March 10, 2020.
When I started thinking about getting back to my routines, this was the hardest one. I’d look at that book by my chair and scoff.
How can I just go back to those 10 dreams when so much has changed? Since I started those, the world shut down. I moved again, got married, reconfigured my business, and have been living in a house full of boxes and utter chaos it seems. (More on that here.) How could I write “I speak on sold out arena stages” when everything is virtual now and I can barely find an extension cord when I need it? Has anyone seen the batteries? There’s a little dinosaur that really needs to roar, per a certain 5 year old, and I still haven’t found the batteries..
Finally, after looking at that notebook in disgust for months, I realized something important. I don’t have to go back to those same 10 dreams. I can pick new ones! I can start completely over if I want. I can revisit that list and decide — do I want to keep these 10 or toss some? How freeing! I felt so trapped by that daily habit because I truly don’t know if the 10 dreams I dreamt up in January will still fit me. They might. And they might not. I’d been avoiding that notebook because it felt like it was forcing me back into my January 2020 self, and I feel like a different person now.
August 2020 Pamela hasn’t abandoned dreaming. The things I’m dreaming about have just changed. August 2020 Pamela doesn’t have less faith in systems like the Start Today journal. She just doesn’t want to be forced to revert back to who she was just a few months ago.
And that brings me to today’s lesson — if something you started is no longer working, regroup. Pandemic or not. If something you were working on no longer feels like a good fit, try something else. How silly of me to think I had to pick up that notebook and write those same 10 dreams, just because I’d written them over and over again 5 months ago.
Instead, I’ll pick up that journal and I’ll look at what I wrote last. I’ll try each of those 10 dreams on for size. Do I still want this one? Or has my passion for it waned? I can answer those questions without judgement. If I like it, I’ll keep it. If it doesn’t feel like a good fit for Post-Corona Pamela, I’ll toss it. Simple as that. I’ll sit for a minute thinking about what I do want to dream about. What does get me excited right now? What would be A TOTAL DREAM if it came true in the next year? You know, once we can go to restaurants and stores without having to go back to our cars for the mask we forgot. I get to reimagine this entire habit and I get to do that as many times as necessary.
And so do you. Some of the things you were working on earlier this year might not be important to you anymore. That’s ok. I’m the queen of pivoting and I’m here to tell you — a few months down the road, you’ll be so glad you made those necessary changes now. If something’s not sitting well with you right now, listen to that intuition. A lot of us are coming out on the other side of this pandemic as changed people. The new you might not need that old thing. That’s ok. Let’s reimagine and regroup together.
