Tag Archives: inspiration

Goals and Not Accomplishing Them

January 7, 2015 Pamela Stephens

Setting goals are pretty much my driving force in both my personal life and my career. (See all of my posts about goals here if you don’t believe me.) Today I’d like to talk about the opposite of accomplishing goals...not accomplishing them.

Honestly, I could go on about this for quite some time. I think that the first thing to realize about not accomplishing goals is that it’s usually not a bad thing. Here are a few reasons why not accomplishing something that you set out to do can be a good thing:

1. You may realize that it’s not actually something that you want to do. This is the case for me right now. One of my 2014 goals was to start a Project Life album. I bought the supplies. I created a cover page (which had a spelling error on it…oops). And then I never touched it again. I didn’t complete a single page of photos for this album last year. I attributed my lack of success with this project partly to lots and lots of struggles with trying to print photos at home. However, a little more self exploration reveals that I really wasn’t very passionate about this goal. While I would like to have printed memories of our daily life, it’s just not something that excites me, and I’m not really willing to push through the challenges. Guess what? That’s ok! Sometimes while working towards something, you might realize that it’s not actually something that you’re passionate about. In this case, it’s perfectly acceptable to not accomplish that goal. Channel your energy to something you are excited about instead.

2. Sometimes the journey is more important than the finish line. Sometimes we spend lots of time working towards something but we don’t quite reach the end result. You might have set a goal to lose 50 pounds and only lost 45. You might have intended to take at least one photo a day for a year but missed several days. Missing goals of this nature are ok! Chances are you still documented more of your life than you would have without the goal in place. Losing 45 pounds is still amazing and something you might not have done without the initial goal. I was $750 short of meeting my financial goal for 2014. Does this mean I failed? Absolutely not! I was close enough to the goal to feel like I won. Just because you might fall a tad short, doesn’t mean that you didn’t still do something amazing.

3. Not reaching a goal can be the driving force you need to accomplish it later. Maybe your timing wasn’t right. Just because you didn’t reach a goal the first time you tried, doesn’t mean that you won’t knock it out of the park later. Sometimes, we just need to reevaluate our methods and approach things from a different way. Didn’t lose the weight you wanted to last year? What can you do differently this year to make yourself more likely to succeed? Maybe you need to workout at a different time. Maybe you should keep different foods in the house to remove temptation. Whatever the goal is, there’s still a chance that you can reach in this year. Don’t be discouraged by past failures. Instead, reevaluate and adjust as necessary. After all, if success was easy, we’d all be great at everything!

As we begin a new year, I thought it would be great to talk about the unspoken...not reaching our goals. It doesn’t mean you’re a failure. It doesn’t mean that you’ll never succeed. Instead, it could just be a learning opportunity or a chance to regroup. Don’t hesitate to set goals for yourself this year, just because you weren’t successful last year. Each day is a new beginning, and I think a new year is a perfect time to dream about what you want the future to be like. Then go get it! Most of the time, we are the ones stopping our own selves from doing great things. Dream big and then go after what you want. There’s no time like the present!

On waiting for perfection.

December 15, 2014 Pamela Stephens

I stewed over starting a “what I’ve learned series” for months before actually doing it. I think my desire to write about things I’ve learned comes primarily from the fact that I feel like I’ve learned so much lately. I also feel like our entire lives are based on learning. With each passing day, we learn something new. With each passing year, we grow into better versions of ourselves (hopefully). We are constantly learning new things about ourselves and this world we live in, and that’s something that I’ve felt called to talk about.

So here we have it…a post that’s hopefully a part of an ongoing discussion about what I’ve learned and what it means. Today, I want to discuss what I’ve learned in regards to striving for perfection. I have been known to wait to do things until it’s perfectly planned out. I may or may not have proofread things to death before ever letting them go. It’s possible that I’ve avoided certain things altogether because I didn’t feel like I had time to do it to its absolute best. I’ve definitely been called a perfectionist a time or two, and while having perfectionist tendencies can be a good thing, it’s certainly not a title that I love. Actually, I’ve found that the goal of perfection is often debilitating. Often, this mirage of perfection sucks up tons of valuable time or worse, prevents us from accomplishing anything at all.

I don’t remember when it happened, but at some point in the past year, I finally realized that I had to let some things go. I needed to learn to delegate tasks in order to grow my business. If I spent less time perfecting every little thing, I could get so much more done! Sure, every single person that I know might not get a beautiful birthday card with a wonderfully scripted message, BUT if just a handful of the people I knew got a card, that was better than none. If the card was basic and simple, it was better than no card at all. I finally realized that I was spending way too much time trying to do everything perfectly, such that most of my good ideas weren’t being implemented at all. A church sign once read, ”The smallest deed is better that the grandest intention.” I was full of intentions…not deeds.

If you, too, suffer from dwelling on perfection, what do you do to overcome it?? That’s a hard question and my solution isn’t too elaborate. You just start doing things. I had to learn to just throw things out there. Within the last couple of months, I’ve “just done” several things that would have normally taken me months and months to implement. For example, this year I mailed a Halloween letter to anyone I had a mailing address for. I ordered the supplies, drafted the content, and then basically turned the rest of the project over to my assistant. I didn’t even see them before they were mailed! (Those of you who know me pretty well know this was a HUGE step for me.) I did something similar with a Thanksgiving promotional piece. I created the plan/content and then handed over the reins. These were prepped and delivered while I was in another state! To take this a step further, I began working on and produced two different Christmas cards in less than 24 hours. Something of this nature would have normally taken me months!

Here’s the deal though. I accomplished four tasks in a short amount of time that I wouldn’t have otherwise done if I’d approached them with my usual mindset. I’ll admit, these four tasks could have been done better. However, with my usual approach, they likely wouldn’t have gotten done at all. This is especially true for our personal Christmas cards. I had to settle on something less than perfect because of time constraints. If I hadn’t sacrificed perfection, we wouldn’t be sending a card this year. Which is worse – a less-than-perfect card or no card at all? We all know how much I love paper products. For me, it was no card at all.

I did something similar with this blog. I spent months and months toying over the idea of starting a blog. I was doing all of the “research,” (In many cases, “research” is code for avoiding the jump.), but I was so caught up in knowing how to do every little thing, that I postponed starting it. Finally, I dove in head first with this post. If I would have known everything there was to know before making that first post, it would have never happened. Most of the time starting it the hardest part. After that, the pieces tend to fall together. Actually, I struggle with this on a daily basis with this blog. Most of the time, I have to make myself hit the publish button. Usually it’s with my eyes closed and a cringed face. You know…that one that looks like you’re about to get hit with a bat. The reality is, some of my posts have typos. Most of them could be written so much better. However, if I read every post 30+ times, nothing would get shared here. I’d change something every single time I read it and eventually I’d be so burdened by the roughness of it, that it would never get posted. Instead, I write, proofread a few times, and then cringe while clicking submit. I take a gamble with every post that it’s poorly written, no one will relate, and I spelled every single word wrong. However, it could be my best post yet. It could really make a difference for someone, and I could be thrilled to come back and read it years from now. (That’s a truly scary thought.) It’s worth the risk.

Is there something you should just hit “publish” on? Is there something that you’re waiting to do until you have a perfect plan? Is there something you haven’t been able to mark off of your list because you keep analyzing it from all angles? If there is, take some time to really think about the time you’re wasting. If you jumped in head first today, would you really regret it? Would it be detrimental to your life? Most likely not. Instead, we’ve been wasting valuable time waiting. Waiting on the right time or the right plan. Waiting on perfection. Well, I’ve decided that imperfection is beautiful. Imperfection is real. Maybe, just maybe, putting things “out there” without them being perfectly polished might make you more relatable. (Please say that my typos make me more relatable. I’m counting on that.) I haven’t mastered this yet, but I’m going to keep working on putting more things on the “deed” side of the balance and less on the “intention” side.

“Life is a game in which the player must appear ridiculous.” – Isabelle in Downton Abbey. Don’t be afraid to look a little ridiculous sometimes. That’s just life.

2 Comments Inspiration & Thoughts 2014 - Christmas card - inspiration - perfection - real estate - What I've Learned

Happy Thanksgiving – Take two!

December 4, 2014 Pamela Stephens

So, Thanksgiving is over and the Christmas season is in full swing. This is when I should start sharing Christmas decor galore and all things holiday related. Well, I’ll likely do that, but not just yet. I want to focus on being thankful a little more.

As I laid in bed on Thanksgiving morning, sipped coffee and read while Matthew slept peaceful beside me, I realized that I had so much to be thankful for. My Thanksgiving Day post talked about how much I love stationary and the new ABM Happy Mail program. While totally honest and true, this post was a little tongue-in-cheek. I wanted to post about something trivial and unconventional, because everyone else would be making posts about their families and such. (Please don’t misunderstand me. I’m definitely thankful for those things too.) However, I wanted my post to be different, and the timing was perfect with the release of something that I am so happy about.

While in bed Thanksgiving morning, I text back and forth with sweet friends and commented on lots of Facebook statuses and photos (something I seldom take time to do, unfortunately). Then I realized something. I was/am incredibly thankful for the opportunity to lay in bed, sip coffee (with a new creamer!) and have the time to catch up with folks I care about. I hardly ever give myself this freedom, and I loved it.

On this Thanksgiving, I was thankful for not feeling guilty for taking a day off. (I almost always do.) I was thankful for having such a huge group of people that I truly care about…even if I don’t tell them regularly. I was thankful for this house that I feel comfortable and safe in. I was thankful for the resurgence of creativity that I’ve had lately. I was thankful for how SIMPLY AMAZING this year has been for my career (more on that later). I was thankful for the ability to buy Christmas presents for my friends and family and for having made such a great start on my shopping. I was thankful for my abilities…for the things I’m both amazing at and not-so-great at. I was thankful for in-laws who welcomed me in to their family…some people aren’t so lucky. I was thankful for the realizations that I’ve had over the last year. My personal growth has blown my mind a bit, and I’m thrilled about that. I was thankful for this online space to talk about what I’m thankful for…ha!

Most of all, I was thankful for the opportunity to sit and think about all of the positive things in my life. It’s so incredibly easy to get bogged down by the negative sometimes. Having a day that’s focused on thankfulness is a good reminder to keep your life in perspective. If you didn’t get a chance to think about the things that make your life amazing, do it now! This doesn’t have to be (and shouldn’t be) a one-day-a-year activity. We all have so many things to be thankful for, both big and small. Make a list if you need to. Turn you phone off for a bit and really sit and think about how lucky you are. If you need my help pointing out some positives, feel free to ask! I’d be happy to help you rediscover the brighter side of things.

Let’s use this holiday season to focus on how amazing our lives are and to share some joy with others. Happy Holidays! (That’s appropriate since it’s technically Christmas, and I’m still talking about Thanksgiving!)

Up next – something Christmas related, I’m sure!

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Two Years of Blogging

October 20, 2014 Pamela Stephens

Well folks, it’s been two full years of blogging for me here at My Neck of the Woods! I really can’t believe that two years have flown by so quickly and that so much has changed in such a short time. My first post was on September 14, 2012. (Honestly, I planned to post an anniversary post on that day but was thinking it was October, not September. I did the same thing last year. Oops.) Nonetheless, I’m happy to report that I still love this place, and that I appreciate you for following along with my crazy life.

So much has changed in my life over the past two years. I’ve gotten married, sold a business and started a new one. Matt’s gone to nursing school (and will finish in February!). We’ve bought a house and a car. We’ve celebrated a first anniversary and a second. We’ve tackled cancer and done some traveling. Two years seems like such a short period of time, but I can assure you that I’ve done so much in those 730 days. A lot of it has been shared here on this blog, and it truly means the world to me that you want to follow along.

In addition to all of our personal changes, this blog itself has changed a lot. When I wrote that very first post, I really had no idea what to expect. Previously, I had just shared my thoughts in extremely long Facebook posts. I had really wanted to find a way to speak out for months and months, but launching a blog seemed so daunting. One day I just sat down and did it. I created a free blogger site with little to no knowledge of how it even worked. I didn’t have goals or plans…I just knew I wanted to try it. A few months later, Matthew created a more complex (and attractive) wordpress site for me, and I felt like a real blogger. My only readers were friends and family, and I wasn’t even sure what I wanted to post about. I just knew I wanted to write.

In the beginning, I thought this would be a DIY blog with lots of fun ideas and tutorials. I thought I’d post inspirational tidbits and blog a lot about decorating. My pictures were absolutely horrible and the layouts of the posts were choppy and hard to follow. I didn’t know what I was doing, and looking back at those early posts are quite embarrassing. (Feel free to take a gander through the archives if you’re brave enough.) However, the important part is that I took the step. I knew that I wanted to tell my story, and I jumped out there and gave this blogging adventure a shot. I just started posting. I didn’t spend years researching my options or learning the best ways to post. I started snapping pictures with my iPhone and posting my thoughts on the internet. I shared crappy projects and bad photos for quite some time as I learned more about the process and my goals for this space.

After two years of blogging, my photos are better (not fabulous, but better). My posts are more like me (not always perfect, but they’re me). I post more regularly (not quite like clockwork yet, but I’m getting there…they’re definitely more frequent than before).

After two years of blogging, I know more about what I want from this space. Like in the beginning, I still want to tell my story. It might not always be a thrilling, invigorating story, but it’s mine. My foremost goal for this space is to simply share my life with those around me. My second goal is to inspire. Whether inspiration be found in a project or home tour or through a post on making this world a better place, I simply want to inspire others to make their worlds work for them. I want people to find beauty in everyday life and see the possibilities that lie around them. At this point, I don’t think this blog will be the place to come for a new DIY tutorial. Two years of blogging has helped me to learn more about myself and my goals, and for now, I’m going to focus on telling my story and using this medium to inspire and encourage others.

When I really sit and think about the fact that it’s been two whole years of posting here, I feel so humbled and thankful. Many of you have read along with me since the very beginning and you’ll never know how much that means to me. For some, you’re new here and that’s just fine too. The fact of the matter is, I feel incredibly honored that you all come here and read my writing (which is sometimes more rambling than writing). You come back post after post and read along. Sometimes you comment. Sometimes you email or message me. Sometimes you mention posts in public, and no matter how you reach out to me, please know that I’m incredibly appreciative. I don’t know what the next two years are going to look like for me, but I can’t wait to see it play out, and I can’t wait to share it with you here.

After reflecting on this little anniversary, I feel like I should say this – whatever little dream or idea that you may have, it’s time to take a chance on it. Take a chance and try something you can’t stop thinking about. You don’t have to know everything about the process and you likely won’t be fabulous at it on day one. However, taking a leap of faith and just starting will be so much more rewarding that never trying. It’s better to have tried and failed than to always wonder what could have been. Chances are, you won’t fail at all. Chances are, that you’ll be able to look back in a few years and see how much you’ve learned and how far you’ve come. Changes are, you’ll look back and be embarrassed at how little you knew back then but be proud of how much you’ve learned.

Here’s to the next two years of living and learning and trying all of the new things! Thanks again for your support and encouragement through my journey.

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One Box + One Thing

September 29, 2014 Pamela Stephens

Every time someone asks me how the new house is coming along, I say the same thing. I’m ready to be settled. I’m ready for boxes to be unpacked and things to be pretty. I had coffee with my assistant, the lovely Taylor McCarty, recently (for her to tell me she’s leaving me…boooo) and I told her the same thing. I’m tired of boxes and the sheer number of things left to do overwhelms me.

Honestly, this tends to be the case with everything for me. When the project feels too much or too overwhelming, I tend to avoid it altogether. Rather than chip away at it a little at a time, I just don’t bother with it. I put it on the bottom of my to-do list and then it nags away at me forever. I even have this approach to cleaning sometimes. Unless I have time to clean the entire bathroom, I won’t even do one thing like wipe down the sink. Reality is, I seldom have time to clean the entire house in one sitting, and I’ll likely not have time to unpack all of the boxes at once.

During our meeting, Taylor suggested that I unpack just one box a day. While I’ve had that idea before, it just sounds dreadful! However, I finally realized that this is really the only way that I’ll make sense of my new home, so I decided to give it a shot. In addition to unpacking just one box a day, I decided that I’d also do one “thing” a day. The list of “things” that need to be done in this house is simply astounding. It feels like it could go on forever. Instead of avoiding all of the things like I have been doing, I’ll do one “thing” a day and unpack one box a day. It’ll likely be painful at first, but I’m hoping that I’ll adjust to the new approach quickly. I decided that I’ll unpack one box and then wipe down the door, hang the shower curtain rod, or clean a set of windows, etc.

After a week or so of using this method, I realize just how helpful it has been. I’ve certainly not enjoyed teaching myself to be okay with not accomplishing everything at once, but I’ve seen progress in my home and that makes it worth it.

As a matter of fact, things are really coming together around the new house. With the exception of the dining room/kitchen/entry way, I don’t feel like the boxes are taking over. We’ve also hung some art on the walls which was one of my September goals. I’ve done quite a bit of moving things around and then moving them again, but nonetheless, I feel like we’re making progress. I suppose I’ll keep unpacking one box and doing one thing until this house of ours is squared away. For my sanity’s sake, let’s all pretend that day is right around the corner!

3 Comments Inspiration & Thoughts - Our First House #mapfirsthouse - 2014 - inspiration - organization

White After Labor Day

September 8, 2014 Pamela Stephens

White After Labor Day 2 Before I even begin discussing wearing white after Labor Day, let me first tell you what I think the number one most important fashion rule of all is. Get a pen…you’ll want to right this down. Are you ready? Rule number one is…WEAR WHAT YOU WANT. Yes, I love keeping up with the latest trends. And yes, there are certain guidelines that you can follow to look your best. However, the most important rule that you can follow in regards to fashion is to not take all of those rules quite so seriously.

So, let’s talk about Labor Day. I think it’s safe to say that most people know that I don’t really enjoy following the rules. After all, rules are made to be broken right?? I think the no-white-after-labor-day rule might be one of the longest living and most strictly followed fashion rules of old. People who still follow this guideline usually stick to it pretty firmly. Today, I want to offer some tips for ways to wear white after Labor Day in a trendy and acceptable way.

I never wear white shoes after Labor Day or before Easter. Honestly, I don’t really care for white shoes that much at all. However, I usually reserve my creamier colored options for the spring and summer months. (Actually, you should be very careful with true white shoes, as they can sometimes look cheap. Usually, something with a creamier color to it will look more expensive and classy.) Now certainly, there could be some exceptions to this rule. None of the tips I’m offering today are meant to be followed religiously. There are always exceptions and it’s always okay to bend the rules a little. Have a fabulous pair of cream heels like these? Wear them! They’d look fantastic with a pair of cuffed jeans and a baggy sweater.
When wearing white pants out of season, I always wear dark colors or heavier fabrics with them. Wearing a bright color or summery printed fabric with white pants will make your outfit look a little out of season. However, pairing the pants with an oversized sweater or deep fall colors, looks perfectly acceptable. Similarly, I usually only wear dark colored shoes with white pants after Labor Day. Wearing a dark shoe instead of a light-colored one helps bring the white pant on into the cooler seasons. One of my favorite looks for winter is white pants with black riding boots and a heavy wool sweater. Following this guideline helps ensure that you won’t look out of season. Instead, you’ll look crisp and trendy!
In addition to not wearing light-colored shoes with white pants after Labor Day, I’ll also seldom wear sandals with them. The exception to this rule for me is wearing a sandal that’s dark-colored and more substantial like the one in my photo from last week. I try to avoid wearing a simple sandal with white pants after Labor Day unless I’m wearing a long sleeve or bulkier top. I usually opt for a closed toe flat or boot instead. Again though, don’t take this rule too seriously. There are almost always exceptions.

While these are a few of the parameters I use when breaking the no-white rule, I don’t even follow them exclusively. As I said above, there are typically exceptions. What I tend to do when planning to wear white after Labor Day or before Easter is ask myself….does this outfit look like fall or does it look springy? If I think it looks a little springy, I’ll try to darken it up a bit. If it looks like I could be standing in a pile of fall-colored leaves holding a steaming cup of coffee, then we’re in business.

As for white purses, if your handbag has an ivory or cream tint to it, then I think it’s acceptable year round! I would, however, reserve a true white purse for the spring and summer months. Again though, be very careful with true white accessories. You always want your clothing and accessories to look more expensive than they actually were, never the other way around.

So there you have it…my thoughts on the no-white rule. As I’m writing this, I can’t actually think of any fashion rules that I follow exclusively. I think I’ve created my own list of “rules” and I like the flexibility of those rules so much more.

Do you have an outfit idea that you’re unsure of? Or a question about how to wear your white accessories after Labor Day? Leave a comment below! I’ll be happy to offer some thoughts/suggestions.

Let’s go break some rules!

Leave a comment Fashion 2014 - fashion - inspiration - What I Wore

One of Those Days

August 25, 2014 Pamela Stephens

In one of my first training classes at Keller Williams, the instructor talked about how she handled “bad days.” Our entire livelihood as realtors revolves around interacting with people. Calling people. Talking to people. Visiting with people. You see where this is going, right?

So, when you have one of those funky days where you don’t feel on your game, working to generate new business is really a waste of time. This particular instructor said that when she notices that she’s slipped into a bit of a funk, she leaves the office and goes to watch a funny movie at the theater by herself. I’ve held on to this random comment for a while now, because we all know that when those sort of days come our way, we don’t actually accomplish anything. I, however, have always forced myself to “push through” and continue working…even if all I want to do is to go home and put on pajamas. Her approach, however, seemed so much more productive. Rather than wallowing and not accomplishing anything all day, she does something to bring her mood back up so she creates at least a few productive hours. Genius!

So, I had one of those days a while back. The morning started out ok but the day went south pretty quickly. In addition to being extremely tired, I was having trouble focusing or wrapping my head around things. Everything started to annoy me…I spilled my entire drink in the parking lot at work, and then I emptied a big box of band aids on the floor. I decide today was the perfect day to give my friend’s method a shot.

I didn’t go to a movie, but I did leave my office and run a few errands I had been putting off. There’s no better time to go get those necessities from Sam’s like the day you don’t feel like being at the office. Rather than using a movie as a pick-me-up, I choose to do a little shopping! I had some Bucks Back to use at Old Navy, so I took a bit to roam around and search for something to perk me up. Then, I ran by Hobby Lobby and grabbed some new paints for a project I’d been dreaming up. What better way to motivate yourself than to plan out projects that you’ve been looking forward to?

Of course, during this afternoon extravaganza, I still worked (My phone rings constantly.), but I was much more productive running errands than I would have been sitting in my office, wallowing in my weird mood. So, next time you find yourself slipping into a little funk, take an hour or so to do something you enjoy…something that is guaranteed to brighten your mood. Then, see if you’re able to come back to your task with a fresh outlook after taking a little breather. More than likely, you’ll have a productive rest of the day rather than wasting an entire day unsuccessfully pulling yourself from a funk.

Let me know if this strategy works for you! I think I’m a new believer. What sort of things do you do to motivate yourself or turn a bad day around? I’m always open to new suggestions!

1 Comment Inspiration & Thoughts 2014 - inspiration

28 vs 22

August 21, 2014 Pamela Stephens

Last week, I was laying in bed, reading through blog posts on my bloglovin’ reader. I had just read Elise’s post about things she’d tell her 22 year old self, when I realized that one of my blog posts that was supposed to post the following week, actually posted that day. Before we continue, here a few things that you need to know in order for this story to make sense.

1. I noticed that the post had gone live because it showed up in my reader. I haven’t shared the details yet or promoted it, but you can use bloglovin’ to keep up with my blog posts. If you use it (or if you’d like an easy way to keep up with your favorite blogs), please follow me there!

2. Even though it may appear easy, blogging is actually quite a bit of work. It takes several hours just to make one post happen. For the past couple of months, my assistant (who is fabulous by the way) has been helping me make sure my posts actually happen. I write the content, take photos, plan out the links/format, and then she sets up the post on WordPress and schedules it to publish. Most of the time, getting the post ready to share with the world takes much longer than the actually writing. Having Taylor’s help with this, has been a tremendous help in making sure I post regularly.

When I saw that the post had gone live before I meant for it to, I cringed. After all, the post wasn’t finished. Before this discovery, I had spent a little time thinking about my 22 year old self. My 22 year old self would have panicked. I would have immediately called Taylor and had her take the post down. I would have told her to be more careful and I would have made sure that never happened again. Not only would my 22 year old self have reacted this way, I think my 26 year old self would have too.

My 28 year old self emailed Taylor to let her know the post went live accidentally and what we could do to watch for that sort of thing next time. I ended the email with, “Btw…this isn’t a big deal and I’m totally not upset about it. Just wanted to point it out for next time. Love you!”

After hitting send, I realized that my 28 year old response to this little issue was much different than my 22 year old response would have been. I certainly want us to pay close attention to details like this, but I knew this wasn’t a tragic event. The post would be just fine without adding the extra photos I was waiting on.

As I thought about the significance of this small event, I realized that we are constantly changing and growing into the type of people we want to become. I feel like the past two years have been simply monumental in my personal growth, a fact that I’ve really struggled to put into words. This short, little email in itself shows one of the larger changes I’ve experienced personally. While I still pay very close attention to detail, I understand that the details aren’t always that important. I also have to give people room for error. There’s not a perfect person in this world and those imperfections are often what makes life so fantastic.

I think the moral of this seemingly pointless story is to realize (and celebrate) how ever-changing life is. As each day passes, we have the opportunity to grow into better and better versions of ourselves. With each new experience, we learn something new. We should take that knowledge and use it to become the best we can be. Even at the young age of 28, I can see how very much I’ve grown already. I love the person I am today compared to who I was at 22, and I’m certain that I’ll love 38 even more than 28. One of these days I’ll be able to wrap my head around some of the life-changing realizations I’ve had lately. For now, I’ll just celebrate this one small example.

If you’d like some more inspirational reading, I had also just read this post that mentions not waiting for perfection. It seems like my Bloglovin’ feed was preparing me for that night’s discovery!

On another note, I’d like to say thank you to everyone who follows along here. Sometimes this place is filled with adventures from my life and decorating ideas. Other times it’s more of ramblings about the things swirling in my head. Either way, it means the world to me that you come and read. I love you all!

4 Comments Inspiration & Thoughts 2014 - inspiration

On Being Positive..

September 3, 2013 Pamela Stephens

I should start today by acknowledging the fact that I haven’t been very diligent with my posts lately. Work has been so very busy, which resulted in me neglecting this online space. I made a promise to myself in this post that I would reserve time to develop this blog, because it’s something that I enjoy. Starting a new business has required a lot of my time and brainpower, but I promise to get back in the groove very soon!

That being said, I had such an interesting experience at Brookshire’s last week. (Brookshire’s is a grocery store for those of you who aren’t local.) The man in front of me in line turned around and told me that my face looked like I was filled with joy. I was so caught of guard by his statement, that I could hardly respond. He followed with saying that if things were bothering me, I looked like I wasn’t letting anything get me down.

I can’t stop thinking about this experience. For several years now, I’ve been making a conscious effort to radiate more positivity. My goal has been to brighten the days of people around me and to see beauty in everyday life. However, I’m not a positive person by nature. As a matter of a fact, my instinct is to immediately think of the worst scenario. When I recognized that this was my tendency, I knew I didn’t want to be that way. I see people on a daily basis that have a negative outlook on everything…people who leave you feeling worse rather than better after being around them. I knew I didn’t want to be that person. I wanted to see the best in people…give them room to make mistakes and grow. I didn’t want to be the person always coming down on everyone else. I wanted to walk away from every conversation feeling like I left someone feeling better than they did before I arrived.

Of course, this hasn’t been an easy journey. It’s very difficult to realize that you’re shifting towards negativity and make yourself stop. It’s even more difficult to correct something that’s habitual and a part of who you are. Undoubtably, I’ve failed many times. However, I’ve kept trying. Last week’s conversation with the gentleman in front of me was a huge milestone in this process. I wasn’t talking to him. I don’t even know that I’d looked directly at him yet. He made his comment out of the blue, after being near me for less than 60 seconds. It left me feeling amazing! I felt like all of the times that I made myself think positively have paid off at least somewhat since a stranger could see positivity in me.

If you find yourself leaning towards negativity or think of yourself as a pessimistic person, know that you don’t have to be that way. You CAN change the way you think. It doesn’t matter if you’re 18 or 83. If you don’t like how you feel or the impact you’re leaving on others, you can be different! It certainly won’t be easy, but my scenario proves that it can be done. I’m sure this is a battle that I’ll fight most of my life, but it’s certainly worthwhile when someone tells you that you’ve shined a little light into their life.

On top of this conversation with the gentleman, the cashier recognized me. She worked at the Brookshire’s in my hometown and remembered me coming in when I was in high school. I hesitate to say this…..but that was almost 10 years ago! I’ve often been told that I have a memorable face, but how amazing that a man compliments me out of the blue and then the cashier recognizes me from years ago.

You think you can’t make an impact on someone, even a stranger? Wrong. As a matter of a fact, you have the opportunity to make an impact on every single person you come in contact with. What sort of impact is it going to be? Positive or negative? It’s your choice.

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Taking a Break

May 7, 2013 Pamela Stephens

It’s almost midnight on Monday, and I’ve spent the last hour and a half working on blog posts and catching up on the latest Bayou Life Magazine.

After a not-so-great afternoon, I spent most of the night cleaning and working on switching my closet over to spring (post coming soon). This Monday has been a pretty tough and exhausting one, and I really needed some time to stop for a bit.

When I finished the project I was working on, I decided to sit in my big, comfy chair and flip though the new magazine. To be honest, I really needed the time to wind down. All to often, I don’t give myself that opportunity, but today it was much needed.

Whatever you’re doing, be sure to give yourself a chance to check out for a bit. Whether you like to read, catch up on a TV series, or knit…it doesn’t matter. You deserve a chance to relax! Plus, taking a minute or two to wind down gives your mind the break it needs to come back refreshed and ready to go.

Tonight’s “time for myself” session included reading some great articles and scoping out Salt & Pepper’s presence in the magazine. Plus, be sure to notice the ad for Bayou Gypsy/Bayou Beaux. My friend, Courtney, has some precious things in her store, and you should definitely go check it out!

After taking this time for myself, I’m feeling much more capable and in charge. Here’s to hoping for a productive Tuesday!

Tuesday update: I obviously planned on posting this earlier today and didn’t. However, I still found it relevant. As a matter of a fact, I took a little extra time for myself again tonight (Tuesday). After cleaning up from dinner, I sat on the patio and painted my nails while watching the latest episode of “Nashville.” (Yes, I’m addicted!) Both my Monday & Tuesday night “breaks” have been ordinary, run-of-the-mill activities. However, they’ve both been things I don’t usually give myself the free time to do, and actually doing them has made me feel like a new person. If you haven’t planned to already, make a point to do something special for yourself this week…Pamela’s orders!

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