I didn’t intend to be a spokesperson for simple living this holiday season. It just sort of happened. I often share my own journey and discoveries online with my community and this year, as I settled in to a simpler way of doing things, I accidentally encouraged other women to do the same.
It wasn’t an easy transition. It was intentional. When I felt the holiday stress and anxiety bubbling up inside, I forcefully pushed it away. It was an intentional decision everyday to just be present in the moment and to do my best for that day.
What I learned was that most of the women around me were struggling with the same thing, with the burden of making everything perfect for everyone. With the stress of somehow making Christmas magic happen amidst our already full schedules. A longing for things to somehow be more simple. Easier. To not wear ourselves so thin, for the sake of a picture-perfect holiday.
More importantly, we’re looking for connection and community. We want to spend time with and enjoy the people we love. We struggle to find the time for this because we’re too busy baking and shopping and going to parties where we don’t even like the hosts. Suddenly we look up and it’s January and we’re exhausted and unfulfilled. We didn’t enjoy any of it and we need two weeks of naps to recover.
This year, I just didn’t want to do that. The season moved by so quickly and as I saw it passing me by, I had to drop things from my list. It meant that lights never got hung on the house and I didn’t really finish decorating inside. It meant I baked less than I thought I would and presents weren’t wrapped with my usual flair. It meant I settled on “ok” gifts instead of “perfect” ones and I never got my nails done. We didn’t wear coordinating outfits for a photo in front of the tree, and I didn’t watch near as many Christmas movies as I’d have liked.
I let so many things go this year. So many good ideas and good intentions. So many expectations. I simply did not want to spend the season riddled with disappointment. This season would come and go whether I enjoyed it or whether I was consumed with things undone. I chose enjoyment and as I posted about that, I saw so many others longing for this holiday peace.
If you missed the posts, here’s a few of them: on inviting people in anyway, on wrapping, on choosing “no storm”, and on sitting with the mess.
Here’s the thing though, this is the sort of thing we’re wanting in our everyday lives too. Most of us are spending 12 months a year, secretly feeling disappointed over things not getting done. We’re wanting quality time with our people and not taking it because of mile-long to-do lists. Being busy with shit we don’t care about has become a way of life. The Christmas season is just a souped up version of this on overdrive.
As we spring into a new year, a time when people resolve to do things differently, I wonder if we don’t simultaneously need to do more and less. More time with friends and family that we miss. Less time marking nonsense off a to-do list. More time for hobbies and walks at the park, less time for cleaning something.
If you’re like me and saw the holiday season fly right past in the blink of an eye, that’s likely what this new year will do too. Before we know it, we’ll be in December 2020 and wondering WHERE IN THE HECK DID THIS YEAR GO. While there’s still time to make 2020 what you want it to be, resolve to do more of the good stuff and less of the fluff. We’re in control of our lives and our schedules, and as hard as it might be to accept that responsibility, it’s untimely our choice. Make it an intentional one.
